A yoke is a wooden crosspiece fastened over the necks of two animals and attached to a plow.
The yoke allows the two animals to share a load together.
Lamentations 3:27 says “It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is still young.”
What does this mean and why is it true?
The yoke in this verse, is about self-control, discipline, embracing and enduring hard things now to prepare for the future.
The yoke is making hard choices in the present in order to increase capacity to handle potential future loads.
If certain things are not learned as a young man they may lead to life-long patterns that are hard to change.
In some cases, a lack of bearing the yoke of restraint and self-discipline by young men means they can ruin opportunity for the future.
For instance…jail or physical injury can permanently change the course of their lives.
I have known young men, who made choices…that followed them the rest of their lives.
God can redeem anything and anyone…but the warning and opportunity remains…bear the yoke now.
The book, “Wild at Heart”, came out in 2001
I read it, and like most books it had some good…but I thought then it was the wrong message for the wrong readers.
If you have read it and benefited from it…great.
Just don’t fall into the trap of thinking any book is all pearls or all shells…the Bible alone is all pearls and no shells.
24 years ago, I saw, young men, embracing the message in the book, sometimes because they were looking for justification to pursue their own “passions”…which translated into…make life about self.
Passion was the buzzword in the Christian sub-culture then.
Some wanted to trust their own hearts and passions and the principles in the book seemed to confirm them in that.
Passion can be good, if constrained by submission to the Word, Spirit, and people of God.
But too often, it’s turned into a pathway to avoid “bearing the yoke.”
Bearing the yoke was seen to be the opposite of “passion”, it is boring, unfulfilling.
“Forget a yoke…I’m no ox plowing some field…I’m a wild lion roaming the Serengeti.”
Well, if you are lion, you better learn to be plow lion, you better learn to bear the yoke…or you will be a dead lion, or lion in cage formed by your own lack of self-control.
I thought then, and I still think so now…Young men need to learn to tame their hearts.
Not in order to become passive, but in order live well over the long-haul…for the glory of God and the good of others.
Shooting stars in their 20s, 30 are falling stars in their 40s, 50s…if they don’t learn to bear the yoke.
If the wild heart is not trained to bear the yoke of faithful obedience…the result is not lasting passion but lasting brokenness.
“Sounds about right, Terry, you are old, you have clearly lost passion, your heart is no longer wild…figures you would say that.”
I say it because it is biblical, not because I am old.
And age has confirmed….it is true.
And I wish my heart was no longer wild, I wish it would continually stay in the yoke with Jesus.
But like Trace said, I spend my life getting back on track.
There is a false dichotomy between wild at heart and passive hearts.
We are to tame our wild hearts…in order to live lives free from both passivity and pride.
The Biblical narrative could be framed around three kinds of hearts:
-A Wild heart: Unrestrained pride:
-Satan told Eve…”you will be like God”
-We see this pride in many faithless men in scripture, including our focus today: Absalom
-A Lazy heart: Complicit passivity
-Adam…standing by while Eve makes the fateful decision, then he follows her lead.
“So she took some of its fruit and ate it; she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.” Gen. 3:6
-We see passivity this in many faithless men in Scripture, including David, Absalom’s father
-A New heart: Faithful empowered obedience
-This new heart is through the Lord Jesus, he had wildest of all human hearts in the best sense of the word.
Yet, he yoked himself to human flesh, and yoked himself to a wooden cross, because he was yoked to the Father’s will, so we could yoke ourselves to him in faith.
Richard Phillips in his book: “The Masculine Mandate” takes issue with the central contention of the book “Wild at Heart”.
In Wild at Heart, it is proposed that the “core of a man’s heart is undomesticated.”
This is supposedly, evidenced by the fact that Adam was created in the wildness outside the garden.
Phillips counters by observing that even if Adam was created in the wildness outside the garden, he was placed by God inside the garden, so that “his life would be shaped not by self-centered identity quests but by covenantal bonds and blessings.”
He believes that the answer to nearly “every question about God’s intentions for men and women is…go back to the garden.”
Richard Phillips (Daniel Kirk web review)
The direction of Scripture is a return to the Garden…unrestricted fellowship with God and others.
The Tabernacle, where God’s presence dwelt with man in the wilderness, in the wild…
was designed to resemble the Garden…God’s ordered life.
The Garden offered unhindered access to God, unbroken relationship with others.
But gardens require proactive attention and faithful care…discipline, yokes…this was Adams’ task that he threw away.
Life outside the garden, east of Eden…we have seen to be a world of wild hearts…chaos, rebellion, war, murder…disfunction, disease.
Wild, sinful, unrestrained human pride and passive, sinful human complicity rule the day all around us.
The new heaven and new earth are the direction things are headed…a return to the garden.
But meanwhile we live in the chaos of unbridled pride and complicit passivity.
Both of these are rooted in sinful, selfishness.
Both need to take up the yoke of Jesus and learn from him.
But first, let’s learn from David and his brilliant, beautiful and utterly foolish son Absalom.
It is, for me, one of the most interesting storylines in Scripture.
I have long been fascinated by men who have risen to the heights of political, athletic, business, Hollywood fame…then have flamed out.
I don’t gloat in their downfall (I hope)…I try to learn from it…now especially as an older man, I hope to stay inspired to finish well.
What is particularly fascinating is when young men rise fast and fall hard.
Absalom is one of Scripture’s shooting stars who flamed out in spectacular fashion.
A full 6 chapters of 2 Samuel is taken up with David’s wild at heart son, Absalom.
The story is tragic and shows two paths to devastation.
Complicit passivity and unrestrained pride.
- David is complicit in the downfall of his sons, especially Absalom, through his passivity.
By “son’s” I mean more than Absalom…I also mean Amnon, and even Solomon.
What’s interesting is that David, outside the home…was far from passive.
*He wasn’t passive as a shepherd…killing dangerous animals in hand-to-hand combat.
*He wasn’t passive in taking the fight to Goliath, or as a warrior king leading armies.
David was mighty on the battlefield and passive it seems, only at home.
David’s eldest son Amnon was a self-indulgent fool.
The heir apparent to the throne is controlled by lust and rapes his half-sister.
Amon’s half-brother Absalom will plot for a full two years and then murder him.
This tells us how messed up he was…it wasn’t a fit of rage, but a long-term smoldering, nurturing of hatred.
David has at the very least been complicit in all this by his lack of training and control of his sons.
He doesn’t do anything as far as we know when his daughter is raped…he becomes very angry, but then…he leaves Absalom stewing and plotting revenge.
Not only has he been passive with his sons, but he has also, by his example years earlier with Bathsheba…shown his sons that kings can take what they want.
A friend once told me that boys grow up they may talk momma, but they tend to walk daddy.
This is not always true, but it often is.
When David should have been at war with his men, he was home passively letting his wondering eyes lead him into passive submission to his own lusts.
David was like many men are: strong and capable outside the home, weak and passive inside it.
By the way this an explanation for some affairs and broken marriages…I have seen this, sadly, more than once.
-At home…he is no hero (or she)
-At work…engaging, successful, wonderful…dreamy.
So, one workplace illusion falls for another workplace illusion…then they form a new home from two broken ones…only to find…it was all illusion.
The passion…all smoke, no real fire.
I hope there aren’t wives here saying “yeah, you tell em.”
The principles about pride and passivity… apply universally…to men and women alike.
So, we see David’s complicit passivity.
But Absalom, like all grown men and women…cannot blame his dad for his own adult choices.
What has been done or not done to us by our parents can help explain some things…but in Scripture, what others do, do not excuse our sinful choices.
- Absalom is destroyed by his own unrestrained pride.
He plots the murder of his brother, then he plots a coup against his father.
He is gifted, vain, self-centered.
David’s complicit passivity coupled with Absalom’s unrestrained pride turns into a heart-breaking disaster for everyone.
The cost is unspeakable high.
Absalom is the central figure in 2 Samuel chapters 13-18.
He is David’s third son, his second son, Amnon is murdered by Absalom.
It is likely his first son died young since he never mentioned again.
In 2 Samuel 13:1-22: You will read the sordid tale of the rape of Tamar, by her half-brother Amnon.
David was furious but did nothing about it, no doubt increasing Absalom’s rage
As I said, Absalom plotted for years to kill his brother.
Three years after the murder, David’s grief turned to longing for Absalom who had fled after killing his brother.
David allowed him to return after these three years but gave him no position, no duties, no responsibility…nothing to do it seems.
This passive aggressive approach helped turn Absalom’s unrestrained pride into something even more dangerous.
Listen to this description of Absalom in chapter 14
“No man in all Israel was as handsome and highly praised as Absalom. From the sole of his foot to the top of his head, he did not have a single flaw. When he shaved his head—he shaved it at the end of every year because his hair got so heavy for him that he had to shave it off—he would weigh the hair from his head and it would be five pounds according to the royal standard.” 14:25
This is not pointless flattery…this isn’t some silly Access Hollywood article.
It is highlighting a consistent theme in the Scripture.
“Man looks to outward appearance, God looks at the heart.”
Absalom is a natural leader…he had physical, mental, gifts…but if he had character he might have made a good king…but he has no character.
He is caught up in his own beauty…why else would a guy, year after year…weigh his hair?
I tell you why, so he could tell all his bubbas at the Jerusalem bar, “My hair weighs five pounds!”
“Wow Absalom, you are a dudes dude.”
What follows this paragraph on his outward appearance are a series of choices revealing that his heart, unlike his body…had plenty of flaws.
He sets up an elaborate scheme to win the people over and he set up a coup against his dad.
He turned many of the troops against David, and David had to flee Jerusalem.
Spoiler alert, if you are reading through the Bible with us this year:
Absalom will die, providentially, entrapped in some tree branches by the source of his vain glory, his own hair…or at least his beautiful head.
David’s loyalists had risked everything to fight for him against Absalom’s rebel army.
When David is told the rebellion has been squashed and his men had won victory…he asks
“Is the young man Absalom all right?”
“Not how are my loyal troopers?”
When told that he is dead, David skulks away crying out loud and weeping.
“My son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you, Absalom, my son, my son!” 18:33
On the one hand, this is understandable…guilt and grief flow out of David.
On the other, this is inexcusable…David is the leader of a nation.
Putting aside emotion, at the right time, for the good of these he leads would not be inauthentic…it would be leadership…he failed as a leader of his people.
Once again, letting his own emotions not his responsibilities reule him.
Good parents…do this all the time.
Parents are not faking when they suppress certain emotional reactions when needed in order to lead their kids.
Sure, this was his son, but many of Israel’s mother’s sons had died
Earlier we read: “Twenty thousand were dead” just on the rebel side…and this was a civil war, it was brother killing brother.
David response was inexcusable.
The entire army heard of David’s reaction.
So now they came sneaking into town after their costly victory like they would after a defeat.
Quiet and ashamed.
Joab, the commander of his army, came to David and said.
“Today you have shamed all your soldiers—those who saved your life as well as your sons, your wives, and your concubines—by loving your enemies and hating those who love you! Today you have made it clear that the commanders and soldiers mean nothing to you. In fact, today I know that if Absalom were alive and all of us were dead, it would be fine with you! “Now get up! Go out and encourage your soldiers, for I swear by the Lord that if you don’t go out, not a man will remain with you tonight. This will be worse for you than all the trouble that has come to you from your youth until now!”
2 Sam. 19:1-7
Proverbs says, “The wounds of a friend are faithful.”
Indeed.
David to his credit…listened and complied. (18)
I wish I could say David fully and finally learned his lesson…but he did not.
Like Trace said, David was not a man after God’s own heart because he was perfect, sinless…but rather because he repented, he continually messed up, fessed up, then got up.
David has not consistently played the part of a sacrificial king, but rather he has too often let his passions or passivity rule over him.
Now, as the Lord told him, the sword will not depart from his own house.
David has been forgiven; he will not suffer the eternal consequences of his sins, but he will pay dearly for them in time.
And importantly for us, God will keep his promises…a new and faithful king, from the line of David was to come, he has come.
Now to application:
We should hate sin; we heard this last week.
We should also, in a real sense, fear sin.
Yes, God will forgive us, if we repent…yes we have power over sin in Christ.
But the consequences in our lives may be terrible indeed if allow sin to have its way in our lives.
Our greatest fear should be that we would be unfaithful in a catastrophic way.
This kind fear is healthy…it shouldn’t us make us hide in inner rooms, afraid to venture out.
It should make us vigilant…diligent to stay in the yoke with the Lord Jesus.
Because his is the way to live without unrestrained pride, or negligent passivity.
Let’s look at what it means to take up the Yoke of Jesus.
Let’s go to Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Matt. 11:28
The cure for both passivity and pride is to “take up his yoke”
It is not passive, a yoke is designed for work, effort.
And it cannot be taken up with pride, on our own we cannot bear the weight…it is light because he shoulders the burden.
He is humble…to yoke with him…means we will must humble
There is effort in the yoke…there is no earning.
Effort is action, earning is attitude.
Jesus issues his invitation to all who labor and are heavy burdened.
Take up my yoke…join me.
Jesus accused the religious leaders of the time of forcing the people to carry heavy burdens…burdens they themselves could not carry…no one could.
But this “rest” of Jesus is not the absence of obligations or like I said, effort….in Matt 5:20 he said, “Your righteousness must exceed that of the scribes and Pharisees.”
To enter into his rest, first, is to stop trying to earn what Christ alone can give.
Then to take his yoke is easy not because it makes lighter demands, but because it represents entering into a disciple-relationship with Jesus. (take my yoke, learn from me)
Come to me…he makes the invitation, we accept and take up his yoke.
After accepting the invitation…we learn over a lifetime what it means to remain in the yoke with him.
A yoke unites two into a common task.
Learn from me…a single-story life…where we are learning to live in sync with the Lord Jesus in every aspect of our lives.
At work, at home, in the gym, in our own thoughts.
If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen
1 Peter 4:11
We have to know his word for it to flow from us as we speak…this takes effort.
We have to stay in the yoke with him; to serve in his strength…this takes effort
Hebrews 4:11 “Make every effort to enter his rest.”
We are to do the work to stay in the rest of Christ.
So, rest is not the cessation of work and effort…it is empowered effort.
Don’t be confused by this biblical tension.
We are not saved by our good works we are saved in order to do good works.
Those good works happen as we stay in the yoke with Jesus.
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Eph 2:8-10
Col. 3:17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord (authority, power of) Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
To restfully work in his yoke…is to focus on faithfulness and to learn to leave outcomes to God…be faithful…do the work…trust God
Learn to walk in sync with Jesus.
Dallas Willard, was a theologian and professor of philosophy at USC.
When he was a young man he trained horses.
He would sometimes put an untrained plow horse into a yoke with an older, trained one.
The young horse would inevitably take off…pulling at the yoke like it was a race.
Willard said you could almost see the older horse seem to say, “Okay, go for it…I’ll let you pull the load.”
This out of sync pulling was exhausting for the young horse and it caused the yoke to inflict sores on the young horse.
Eventually the young horse would sync with the old horse…it was still work, but what a difference in how the work went.
We tend to want to let our hearts run wild…to run out in front of or apart from Jesus.
We don’t like his pace.
We don’t like the yoke at all.
I don’t want to plow this boring, crummy field.
We want passion…not a dull job, not a Kellogg commute, not a diaper to change, not a kid throwing a tantrum.
On Friday, I watched my father-in-law feed his wife of over 60 years…as she lay in a bed that she has not risen from since last August.
He does this with faithful and non-complaining obedience…because he has, for a long, long time, stayed in the yoke with Jesus.
You don’t want that?
Who does?
We don’t get to choose all that will happen to…we must choose to train for faithful obedience.
We want adventure…to do great things for God…how can this plowing in this field, under this hot sun…be the will of God?
Where the adventure in this? Where is the passion?
Look over there…is Jesus over there, are you yoked with Him? Is this faithfulness now?
Is this where he has you now, is this the field to plow now?
Stay in the yoke…do not grow passive and do not become proud.
God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
1 Peter 5:7
Humble yourself under God’s mighty hand.
In his time, he will lift you up…he will prosper in his way and his time, the work of your hands.
In the yoke with him, you can work and abandon worry.
You can lay aside pride and lay aside passivity.
Take up the Yoke of Jesus…sync your life to his will and his ways.
Rodney is going to sing a song written about all of us, we are farmers called to plow faithfully in the field that is our lives.
Pay special attention if you are a young man or woman…to the line that speaks to you.
Part of being able to bear the yoke is that God has put you in a church.
God invented the church and there is nothing like it on earth.
You can look to the older brothers and sisters who are pulling for, casting vision for you, coming alongside you…you can fight and win the urge to quit, the urge to stop…as you look over at the old farmers.
If you are older…and tired…you can’t stop…because you are responsible for those who are watching.
Let’s listen…then we will have opportunity to pray.